So maybe I’m taking a huge leap into the unknown. I can’t see where I’m going to land, but maybe that doesn’t matter. Maybe I will be okay because I’m having one of those moments right now. A moment where everything is so clear and the whole world is spread out beneath me like it’s Google Earth.
There are so many places I want to go and things I want to do.
I want to write books without predictable endings or boring titles. I want to become a folk singer and play music that is triumphant, lovely, and heartfelt. I want to transfer schools. I want to stay right where I am. I want to travel to Scotland and sit in the cafe where J.K. Rowling first sat and wrote magic on a napkin.
I want to go to Nepal and have my heart broken by the orphans and drink real chai tea. I want to be a photographer. I want to take beautiful pictures of people without them even knowing it. I want to work for National Geographic and take pictures of real things, places, and people, with real hurt and real happiness.
I want to become a screenwriter/director and make a movie about two good friends who decide to get drunk and film themselves watching movie marathons and helping each other fall in love.
I want to be a Young Life leader and change someone’s life by showing them that hope exists. I want to become a ghost hunter and travel the world in search of haunted locations and see something supernatural. I want to drive from Switzerland to France park the car on the beach and wake up the next day surrounded by flamingos. I want to learn to speak french so I can sing Vive la rose while playing the piano.
I want to take a class in Theater Arts or join a drama club and do improv. I want to be bold and take risks. I want to be witty, decisive and assertive.
I want to design pretty dresses and stellar shoes. I want to decorate the insides of people’s houses. I want to learn how to cook or marry someone who will cook for me while I stick to toast and buttered noodles. I want to have kids but only if they are awesome and like the original Star Wars movies better than the prequels.
I want to live in a beautiful home with cats, dogs, and laughter. I want art all over the walls and a room that is floor to ceiling books with just a large chair in the middle. I want a vegetable garden in the back and a fort just barely big enough for two. I want blankets and knick knacks and colored glass. I want to share that home with someone who kisses my hair, smiles when I make a face, and knows all of my secrets.
I want to never lose touch with my family and the friends I have now.
I want to make people listen. I want to be remembered. I want to be the answer to the question, “what’s the best thing that ever happened to you?” for one person. I want to scream out so everyone can hear me.
Look out world, I’m taking over.